In the first part of this blog, we looked at some general principles of how we talk to children about Hell. But here I want us to grapple with something very specific and personal.
A common way for the subject of heaven and hell to come up with children is when someone they know dies. “Has Auntie Susan gone to heaven?” they ask. One of the principles I outlined in my last post was that we must move from what we don’t know to what we know. We have to be careful here to only teach what we can confidently know from the Bible—especially when the temptation is to give instant comfort and say “Yes, Auntie Sue is happy in heaven with Jesus”.
If we know that Susan was a follower of Jesus, we have a great opportunity to reinforce Biblical teaching on assurance. Let’s take it!
“We know that Auntie Susan was a Christian. She loved Jesus. And Jesus promises us that everyone who trusts in him will one day be with him in heaven (John 10 v 28). Jesus always keeps his promises—so we can be sure that she is with him in heaven now.”
But what if we’re pretty sure that Susan wasn’t a believer? Then two things come into play.
First, we must be careful not to make assumptions about Sue’s spiritual state. We know from the thief on the cross that it’s possible for someone to put their trust in Christ at the very last moment (Luke 23 v 32-43). So even if we think it unlikely, we cannot state definitely that Sue wasn’t a believer, and that therefore she is in Hell.
Second, we move from what we don’t know (Susan’s spiritual state) to what we do know (God’s character and Christ’s promise). This allows us both to reinforce biblical truth and also to answer the question behind the child’s question—which may well be that they are wondering what will happen to them when they die. So we say something like this:
“I don’t know whether Auntie Susan was a Christian or not—so I don’t know where she is right now. But we do know that God is absolutely loving, and totally fair. We can trust God to do the right thing. But we also know that Jesus has promised that everyone who believes in him will one day live in heaven with him. So if you love and trust Jesus, you can be absolutely sure that one day you will live in heaven with Jesus. And living with Jesus forever is going to be wonderful!"
In some cases, you might also add, “I don’t know where Auntie Susan is right now, but I do know that, wherever she is, the thing she most wants for you is that you will be in heaven with Jesus for ever.” This is based on the rich man who wanted Lazarus to warn his brothers about hell (Luke 16 v 19-31).
It might also be appropriate to pray with a child, and to express these truths again as you thank God for Auntie Susan and for what she meant and means to you. This will help the child focus on what we do know: that the Lord is rich in mercy, is completely just and will always do the right thing.
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Is Hell For Real? is a short and accessible book written by pastor and author Erik Raymond to help Christians understand the Bible's teaching on God's judgment and hell.
Alison Mitchell is a senior editor at The Good Book Company, where she has worked on a range of products including Bible-reading notes for children and families, and the Christianity Explored range of resources. She is the best-selling author of The Christmas Promise and the award-winning Jesus and the Lions' Den.
