The gospel-shaped church should be like a family because it is a family. That is the overarching theme of 1 Thessalonians 12-15: how Christian love is manifested in our relationships.
It can be very hard, frankly, to put this into practice. It’s hard to know one another. It is not so different from a biological family. In families, people get on one another’s nerves and have to learn to forgive. And when it comes to a local church, Paul encourages us to strive to be a family that is shaped by the gospel. In these verses, he is telling us what that looks like.
The gospel-shaped church should be like a family because it is a family.
It’s amazing how different the members of one family can be. If you have several children, as they grow up, you begin to see very, very different aspects of their characters and personalities emerge. It is like that in a local church too; it comprises very different kinds of people.
In verse 14, Paul outlines how Christians should respond appropriately to each different kind of family member.
First, we are to “admonish the idle.” This word “idle” is a military term referring to somebody who is out of step with the other soldier marching in the rank. Paul says that what we need to do with this kind of Christian is admonish them. This is the same word that was used in verse 12.
The leaders of the church are supposed to admonish us—which means they are to hold the word of God up before our eyes and say, “This is the standard of the Christian life. This is what we’re to do; this is what we’re not to do.”
Note that Paul is saying here that the whole congregation is to be doing this to one another. We are not just to leave it to the pastors or the elders; we, as a congregation, are to be exhorting one another in this way. Don’t hear this as an excuse to throw your weight around with your fellow church members; it’s not about telling people off for anything you don’t like. Rather, it’s about helping and encouraging your brothers and sisters. If you think you ought to admonish someone, always take time first to read Scripture and ensure that what you are doing is calling that person to live in line with God’s word.
Second, “encourage the fainthearted.” “The fainthearted” may refer to some of the people who, as we saw in chapter 4 and the start of chapter 5, were struggling because of their concerns about loved ones who had died. These are perhaps people who are very easily discouraged, and they may be those whom Paul means by “fainthearted” here; alternatively, he may be referring to people who are constitutionally timid—or perhaps both. But notice that this time, the other Thessalonian Christians are not to admonish but to encourage. For the fainthearted, the response is not to get on their case but to gently encourage them and strengthen them.
Third, “help the weak.” Paul could simply mean the physically weak here; or he could be referring to people who are spiritually immature. Perhaps it could be those people who are stumbling and struggling with sexual immorality, whose sin Paul addressed in 4:3-8. We are not to kick such sinners out but to seek to help them.
So Paul is outlining three different responses for three different kinds of church members. It’s not that we are to become busybodies nor a collective Big Brother, spying on one another’s lives; it is that we should care enough to engage with one another about important things in the Christian life.
Patience is an expression of love, and so when I am impatient, I’m actually showing a deficit of love.
5:4 finishes with an overall instruction. “Be patient with them all.” I so often excuse myself by saying, “I’m just impatient.” It feels like being a little impatient doesn’t matter as much as other faults. But being impatient is actually being unloving—since 1 Corinthians 13:4 says that love is patient. Patience is an expression of love, and so when I am impatient, I’m actually showing a deficit of love.
When we see someone who has walked out of line, we are not to snap our fingers at them or snap out our words to them. Rather, we are called to be patient. We admonish them, and we persist in looking out for them.
When we see someone who is fainthearted and easily discouraged, we do not become frustrated at their apparent failure to take hold of the promises they have in Christ. Rather, we are called to be patient. We encourage them and remind them that God is their strength.
When we see someone who is weak—someone who is stumbling or helpless—we do not ignore them or put a time limit on our help to them. Rather, we are called to be patient. We do all that we can to help them. Patience is to overarch all of our dealings with one another.
This blog is an excerpt from Thessalonians For You by Ligon Duncan, an accessible walkthrough of 1 & 2 Thessalonians which helps readers to live in light of Jesus' return. For more expository Bible studies and Bible study guides, check out our God’s Word For You series and accompanying Good Book Guides
Ligon Duncan (PhD, University of Edinburgh) is chancellor, CEO, and John E. Richards Professor of Systematic and Historical Theology at Reformed Theological Seminary. He previously served as the senior minister of the historic First Presbyterian Church in Jackson, Mississippi, for seventeen years. He is a cofounder of Together for the Gospel, a senior fellow of the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, and was the president of the Alliance of Confessing Evangelicals from 2004–2012. Duncan has edited, written, or contributed to numerous books. He and his wife, Anne, have two children and live in Jackson, Mississippi.
