Emma Freud recently wrote an article about the responses she received when she asked her Twitter followers what their biggest regret was. She was overwhelmed at the response.
By far the most frequent was not doing the right thing when someone they loved died. Others wished they had spoken out about abuse earlier. Many regretted not working harder at school, and others were disappointed they hadn’t told someone that they loved them.
Almost all the regrets were linked to fear—people wished they had been strong and courageous, but had been too afraid.
Wouldn’t it be great to live a life free from these sorts of regrets? To look back and know that we tried to do the right thing, whatever anyone else thought of us? To enjoy a life full of love and commitment and challenge?
We need to learn this because the best things we do are usually the hardest. You only get to enjoy the view from the top of the mountain if you choose the uphill path.
Learning a language, training for a triathlon, starting a new business… The most daunting tasks are also the most rewarding. Whether it’s committing to a relationship or confronting a problem that you’ve avoided for too long, the most fulfilling experiences come from tackling the most frightening challenges.
Faith in Jesus can make us fearless in the adventure of loving difficult people, tackling difficult challenges and persevering through difficult times
Almost everything that glorifies Jesus and demonstrates care for others is a struggle. Being a parent, praying out loud, inviting a friend to church, welcoming people into your home for a meal, campaigning for justice, speaking to someone who has just been bereaved… The best things we do really are the hardest.
Yet so often I do what is easiest for me rather than what is best for others. I find myself putting off unpleasant tasks. I’m addicted to live text commentaries of sporting events when I should be talking to my children. I use humour to avoid being honest or vulnerable.
But I’ve found hope and the power to change in the Bible. The Bible shows us the one person who always made the best choices, however hard they were. Jesus always loved difficult people, always tackled difficult challenges, and always persevered through difficult times.
The Bible doesn’t just show us what Jesus is like. It also shows us how we can become like him. How we can live with Jesus’ courage, integrity and love. How you can.
That’s what my book, Escaping Escapism, is about. It comes from my story of how Jesus has been taking a natural-born escapist and helping me climb the mountains that I face. It shows how faith in Jesus can make us fearless in the adventure of loving difficult people, tackling difficult challenges and persevering through difficult times.
It shows how we can live a life free from regret—by doing what is best, even when that is also what is hardest.
Dave is Team Rector in Drypool, east Hull, UK. Before that, he pastored in Toxteth, Liverpool. He is married to Helen and they have four children. Dave is a regular contributor to the Explore daily Bible-reading series.