60% of us will be a carer at some point in our life. 10% of us are right now. There are some 7 million carers in the UK - 13,000 of whom are under 18. Wikipedia suggests 50 million in the US. It sounds a lot but those stats could well be right. There are millions of people quietly undertaking vital roles within our families, within our communities, often at the expense of career and other relationships.
A carer is someone who provides unpaid support to an ill or disabled friend or relative who would not be able to cope without their help. The role ranges from popping to see a neighbour a couple of times a day with shopping and a willingness to help them dress to full-time care for a loved-one with multiple and profound physical or mental needs. It could be tending to the complex requirements of a spouse who has suffered a severe stroke or making safe a parent with advanced Alzheimer’s Disease.
Many carers are themselves elderly or frail but not all. For some children the daily routine involves making breakfast for an incapacitated parent before leaving for school – then coming home with the shopping to make them dinner. For a few it involves mopping up the less than sanitary consequences of substance abuse in the home – disposing of bottles and needles, dialing 999 when the worst happens …
The permutations are limitless. But in every story there is some common ground – there is pain, pain that at times masks the privilege that it is to stand alongside those who suffer. This week on The Good Book Blog we are going to look at how churches can care for the carers in their congregation.
There were rumours and speculation aplenty. Those who had read the signs of the times knew that there was an unfinished storyline - that someone new was coming - someone who would put things right and rescue humanity from its darkest danger.
But who? Would he be young or old? Would he come as a peaceful compassionate lover of souls? Or would he be an avenging conqueror? And then to everyone's surprise the day of the great revelation came...
Not a bumbling do-gooder, but a serious, dangerous-looking man with hard eyes would be playing the new Doctor Who.
Who did you think I was talking about?
The new Doctor, it was announced on live TV last Sunday night, will be 55-year old Scottish actor, Peter Capaldi - best known for his recent role in in the award-winning In the Thick of it where he played a foul-mouthed government spin doctor. The acting range he brought to that role - passionate and venomous outbursts of anger, and an ability to portray vein-throbbing rage will give new impetus to the scriptwriters for the next series.
But, beneath the veneer of looks and personality quirks, the doctor remains the same deep down. A penetrating understanding of people and situations; burningly passionate about protecting humankind; desperately wanting to redeem even the worst of his enemies; offering mercy but unleashing uncompromising justice on those who refuse his mercy.
Perhaps what makes this show so timeless and watchable is how the Doctor reflects so many qualities that we see in a saviour who is far from fictional.
I was reminded this morning of one of our set texts at school—Charles Dickens’ David Copperfield. In particular of Barkis, the local cart driver. Specifically of the minimalist way he proposes to Peggotty, the Copperfield family’s servant. Barkis got the young David to take the message:
"Tell her, 'Barkis is willin'!' Just so."
What a romantic he was.
It’s 40 years since I read David Copperfield, but “Barkis is willin’” has stuck tenaciously in my mind. And it came back to me this morning as I wondered about that word “willing”. It struck me that, although it can sound conditional, it’s really a statement of intent. Like the bride who says: “I will”. So I looked it up in Collins English Dictionary:... continue reading
At the end of Matthew’s Gospel, Jesus tells eleven men to “go and make disciples of all nations” (28 v 19). But who was he talking to?
I’ve heard and read several times over the years that this “Great Commission” was:
The rest of us are called to live distinctive lives, and answer people’s questions (1 Peter 3 v 15); but we’re called only to be reactive (waiting for the question to come), rather than proactive (aiming to talk about Jesus).... continue reading
Caught a snatch of a discussion on BBC Radio 4 Today programme about marriage this morning. It centred around research that showed the decline in people who marry young and stay married - childhood sweethearts for life - but quickly became much more general.
At one point, one of the panellists TV agony aunt Denise Robertson said this:
"A good marriage is the nearest thing we get to heaven on earth. A Bad marriage is the nearest thing to hell."
How true. On two different levels. Having supported several friends through messy and painful divorces, I have glimpsed the agony, stress and torture of a marriage gone wrong. And having known many strong, loving committed marriages - both Christian and non-Christian - I can testify that these relationships can be truly beautiful things.... continue reading
Here are five things to ask God for, guided by Ephesians, as you look at the small, precious miracle of creation lying peacefully crying unstoppably in your arms…
Heavenly Father, please give this little one…
1. Faith in Christ.
“I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you…” (Ephesians 1 v 18). More than anything else, your baby needs to know the certain eternal hope of a future with Christ. This is the most important thing you can pray for them. You probably know this, but it’s so very easy to pray for health/happiness/a good night’s sleep instead.... continue reading
Dissatisfaction - Desire - Opportunity - Indulgence
4 words that broke the world.
4 words that mar our relationship with God every day.
4 words that will challenge us until the moment Jesus returns.
4 words that defined my choice of lunch today ...
I'll be honest with you, I'm bored of egg sandwiches. Ham is little better. And the salads I make for myself (if I get up in time) are wonderfully healthy but don't always survive the hot and bumpy journey to work well. Lunch is not my favourite meal of the day. I was reflecting on that fact last night. I'd just finished dinner - a much more inspiring and satisfying delight, concocted with the full armoury of herbs and sauces available in my kitchen...... continue reading
I'm delighted to have worked with Sam Allberry on his new book Is God anti-gay? It's a subject close to my heart as I have many close Christian friends who have wrestled with this issue. In any sizeable church there are likely to be two or three present for whom this is an issue in some way.
Part of the issue was the need for secrecy. It is only relatively recently that "the love that dare not speak its name" has become normalised in society as a whole. And as Sam articulates so compassionately in his book, there are still many believers who feel unable to share the nature of their particular temptation for fear of being judged, rejected or misunderstood by others in their fellowship. I am praying that the message of this book, as it is read by whole congregations will start to remove the fear and ignorance which many of us have - and make our churches more intelligently caring in this area.... continue reading
Football’s Suicide Secret is a programme shown a few days ago by the BBC. It was extremely well presented by footballer Clarke Carlisle, and I was impressed by how balanced it was. But it also got me thinking. How like footballers are we?
Here are some of the main points that come out in the documentary:... continue reading
"So, which sin are you tackling this week?"
It wasn't a question that took me by surprise. My friend and I are both working on a counseling course at the moment. One of our projects is to identify a persistent sin in our lives, analyze it and take biblical steps towards change. Not the most comfortable of assignments but undoubtedly useful!
As I wrestled with some of my heart-issues last week, a range of questions flitted through my mind. But one of the biggest was this: why on earth had I waited for a piece of coursework before starting to address my rebellion?... continue reading
